One of the invitations before session 2 was to write a letter to yourself, to be sealed and delivered to you at the Journey's end.
Since I am still so unsure of what I hope to gain from this experience, I am trying to accept all invitations, I have a worry of 'doing it wrong' or 'missing something important' that will keep me from reaching whatever pinnacle it is I have yet to identify.
So, I wrote the letter today and it kind of turned into a journal and totally got away from me at points, but I tried to just let it flow unedited. Some of the things I wrote were hard to put in print, where someone might see them! I kept saying, "pen to paper, now! It's a letter to yourself, so you can see how much you grew in 4 months, not a manuscript for publication" but then I start thinking about the poor relatives who might have to suffer through my ramblings long after I'm gone and am reminded of why I do not keep a diary. The letter remains unshredded, invitation accepted, but I don't expect it to live long past its April delivery. The conversations I have with myself are not the perspectives I put forward as my identity, and I'd like to keep it that way. Plus, the letter was damned depressing.
No comments:
Post a Comment