"Whether we are at an early stage in our career, a mid-level manager, or a senior executive, we are all CEOs of our own lives". (p. 22)
Really makes it hard to blame the current state of my life on externalities...if by 'clarifying [my] inner identity, purpose and vision so [my life] thereafter is dedicated to a more conscious, intentional manner of living and leading' (p. 27) I can find greater satisfaction with what I have, or the courage to take the bold steps to change it, I am (extremely tentatively) on board.
I have always considered self-help and positive thinking to be pathetic wastes of time and/or money, but I have begun to recognize lately, even before beginning Journey, that it is easy to make fun of things I am unwilling to try. It's like stating that something I've never tasted is 'disgusting', another bothersome habit I must own up to.
So, this chapter made me wonder if I am really ready to jump on the insideout/outsidein train to sunshine and rainbows in my life. I am more than skeptical of success, I am cynical towards the very process. Sit and listen to my non-judgmental mind? Really? What if once my mind settles and I pose the big questions of What is it that is really important to me? and What is the life I want to live? there is just a blank void of space with the occasional unpaid bill flitting through? Again I wonder if it is possible to fail at self-reflection.
This books claims that it will help me face my toughest challenges and 'lean into the light'. I'm hoping a good night of sleep will quiet the snarky voice in my mind laughing at that claim. One of the things I hope to work with a coach on during the Journey is to be open-minded and to honestly explore the various paths open to me as part of the program. Even though I know that my sarcasm and negativity make me unhappy, they have been my shield against situations that I felt were beyond my control and abandoning them seems both frightening and a little bit stupid.
It's only the Introduction and I'm already nervous.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
Plenty to think about
So, I survived my public speaking, kindof. I could feel the red on my face, so that's always pleasant. Paul Biwan, the faciliator, commented that even for those of us who struggled, in the environment we were supported and that was why everyone was able to get through it, we knew that our audience would be patient. Many people commented that they disliked speaking to a group, so at least I had company in my misery.
The day as a whole was very interesting. We were given several resources as we choose our initial path. Six suggested starting points are listed in the handbook, and also the books Good to Great and Leadership from the Inside Out. Then it was said that everything suggested in the workshop should be considered as an invitation. There won't be time to accept and take advantage of all the invitations, but by honestly and diligently pursuing a few you'll get more from the experience.
It was kind of surreal. Information with no assignments, no solid expectations other than to grow as a person. I'm somehow more nervous than I was this morning. What if I fail at self-improvement? Past experience has shown introspection to be an exhausting and sometimes painful process. I'm hoping once I read through the workbook and pick a first step I will feel less daunted by the process of bushwacking a trail through all the possibilities I've always considered too hard...
The day as a whole was very interesting. We were given several resources as we choose our initial path. Six suggested starting points are listed in the handbook, and also the books Good to Great and Leadership from the Inside Out. Then it was said that everything suggested in the workshop should be considered as an invitation. There won't be time to accept and take advantage of all the invitations, but by honestly and diligently pursuing a few you'll get more from the experience.
It was kind of surreal. Information with no assignments, no solid expectations other than to grow as a person. I'm somehow more nervous than I was this morning. What if I fail at self-improvement? Past experience has shown introspection to be an exhausting and sometimes painful process. I'm hoping once I read through the workbook and pick a first step I will feel less daunted by the process of bushwacking a trail through all the possibilities I've always considered too hard...
The Journey begins today
So, I'm a little nervous about the new training I am starting today. It's not your usual prescriptive workshop where you come away with some specific things to try, it's a four month "Journey into Leadership" which is really about finding your own path to being a leader in your own life, which has nothing to do with your position.
I have to give a 2-3 minute introduction and I really hate talking in front of groups. I spent some time last night writing and then typing what I thought I wanted to say, but today I think it sounds too stuffy and speechy and, did I mention I hate talking in front of groups?
I have to give a 2-3 minute introduction and I really hate talking in front of groups. I spent some time last night writing and then typing what I thought I wanted to say, but today I think it sounds too stuffy and speechy and, did I mention I hate talking in front of groups?
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